


The Tear Stains Dry

by Brain_Flower



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Tommy Ratliff (Musician)
Genre: Adommy, M/M, Minor Character Death, Original Character(s), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-23
Updated: 2012-05-23
Packaged: 2017-11-05 21:42:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/411310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brain_Flower/pseuds/Brain_Flower
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For you I bleed myself dry...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Tear Stains Dry

**Author's Note:**

> All you have to know is that this one contains a minor death by suicide, and an orignial character that pops up in a few of my stories occasionally.

For you I bleed myself dry. No one ruins it by screaming something about it being romantic. There is nothing romantic about suicide…in fact, the fact that it happened leaves Tommy feeling empty and lonely. Why? Why did she do it? Why while he was so young and home alone? Why was his older sister so selfish?

Lisa left no hints, unless his parents knew something he didn’t, unless there was something being hidden from him. All that’s written is for you I bleed myself dry in red lipstick on the bathroom mirror. And then there’s Lisa, bleeding from the wrists and hanging from her throat, face swollen, blue, dead. 

That selfish girl…he hopes she suffered, she slowly choked to death, she hung there for minutes before she died. He only grabs the house phone from the cradle as he heads downstairs and calls emergency services and then Mommy and Daddy. 

The house is roped off, Tommy is being questioned, and Lisa’s body is placed in a bag all before the little six year old blonde’s parents can get home from their evening plans. 

Daddy says, “Stop bothering the baby.” To the police asking Tommy questions, and places his son in his rock star pajamas on his hip. But Mommy calls Tommy the baby and Daddy calls him buddy so why is tonight so different? 

“Where is Lisa Daddy?” Tommy asks, eyes closing heavily as he lays his head on his father’s shoulder. “Why will she bleed? Why did they put her in a bag, why Daddy, why?” 

Ron only sighs, “Well buddy…Lisa was very sad all the time, and she wanted to be happy again. But you know where she is?” He asks and Tommy waits for him to answer, large brown eyes blinking once. “She’s in the sky watching over her little brother.” He pokes his son’s belly, receiving a giggle from him. “And she loves you and so do Mommy and I. Now go to sleep buddy, it’s been a big day.” 

The rest of the questions are for Daddy and Mommy, so Tommy let’s himself sleep in Daddy’s arms, and let’s Mommy run her fingers through his hair. All they do is talk about Lisa. 

And how she bleeds herself dry…

-_\/\/_-Siren Jax-_\/\/_-

Mommy and Daddy say he’s not sick, he’s tired and too much has been going on, but if he’s tired then why isn’t he sleeping? Every night he has nightmares about Lisa coming into his room and trying to make him bleed until he’s dry. 

He always asks Lisa why. Why does she want him to do the same thing she did? Daddy always wakes him up and tells him he had another nightmare and that he talks in his sleep. 

Daddy says Tommy is safe because Lisa is gone and happy again and watching over them in the sky. But Tommy still doesn’t sleep well, no matter what. He doesn’t sleep in Mommy and Daddy’s room, or on the couch, or even in Lisa’s old room. 

Every night, every time Lisa finds him and wants him to do everything she does, but he never gets a chance because Daddy wakes him up…shame on Daddy!

But the nightmares just don’t go away, they continue into grade school, even still when he’s in junior high, in high school. Lisa always finds him, tries to snatch him, and Daddy is always there to wake him up and get him back to sleep. 

And now Mommy and Daddy tell him it’s anxiety. The doctor says it’s anxiety, post traumatic stress disorder and it’s causing him to stay awake at night…insomnia. 

Dr. Parker tells Mommy and Daddy that Tommy is probably a year or two mentally behind the other kids his age, but the blonde knows that can’t be true. He’s smart, he just likes his smart being different from everyone else’s smart. 

Daddy calls it creative, he says creativity is good for Tommy. So Tommy talks to Lisa, even though she lives in the sky and he plays guitar and writes music every now and then. Because it’s good for Tommy to be creative and Dr. Parker says he should continue everything. 

-_\/\/_-Siren Jax-_\/\/_-

Tommy has his first panic attack the minute Daddy and Mommy say they’re moving to Los Angeles, California. Tommy feels trapped, his breathing picks up in short, shallow gasps, and he’s shaking visibly. If they move he won’t see Lisa’s grave or where she died, or have the same friend’s or anything. He’s freaking out, and pacing, and shaking. 

Daddy grabs him though, sits down on the couch and tells him to breathe easy. Mommy takes Tommy’s hand and says, “We want you to get away from all the bad honey…that’s all. We fear this town doesn’t have good memories for you, sweetie…we want you to be happy.”

Tommy doesn’t talk though, when he tries it comes out broken and thick with tears. So Daddy hushes him, tells him it’s ok, everything will be fine…he’ll get used to it, and it’ll be good for him. 

He has to take their word for it. 

-_\/\/_-Siren Jax-_\/\/_-

The second panic attack he has, he’s standing in the driveway of the new house and a kid riding his bike down the sidewalk stops and watches. Daddy grabs Tommy, though, and smiles at the kid, but then he rides off to the house directly across the street. 

On Saturday Tommy walks down the block and finds the cemetery. He knows Lisa isn’t here, but he thinks that meeting other dead people will be ok. He sits down at a headstone marked Justin Cooper and pulls his blankets over his head to block the wind. 

It’s a quiet day and in thirty minutes he knows Justin was sixteen when he was murdered. And then he’s got company, a girl his age sits down beside him and says, “That’s my brother…my name is Abigail Piper…I’ve never seen you before.” 

“I’m Tommy Joe Ratliff.” Tommy says, “I moved in Thursday because Mommy and Daddy said we had to…my sister is buried back where we used to live.” 

Abigail nods, “My mommy and daddy are in jail…I live by myself in the apartments ten minutes from here. I come here every weekend.” She pauses, “Well, I suppose since you’re here and we’ve talked we’re friends.” 

That was easy…

“Well, Adam will just have to find me.” Abigail mutters, hiding under the blankets with Tommy. “Adam is my other friend, he comes down every Saturday with food and I like that because I live by myself as you know and often I don’t have food throughout the week. You need experience for a job after all and most places don’t hire anyone that looks like trash.” 

Tommy doesn’t think Abigail looks like trash. Her jeans are a little worn and she’s wearing a white tank top, but her face is pretty and smooth and her hair looks even, freely falling off her shoulders. She must get by well enough to afford make-up …or maybe Adam’s just really cool. 

“Who’s your guest, Abigail.” A light voice asks from behind, and the blankets lift on Abigail’s side. Above them is a boy probably Tommy’s age with intense blue eyes and freckles. 

Abigail smiles, “This is Tommy.” She says, “Tommy, Adam. Our new friend, found him today, just sitting at Justin’s grave. He’s real quiet.” 

“I saw you.” A younger boy beside Adam says, “You moved in across the street from us. You were freaking out all weird when you got out of the car.” 

Tommy knows this kid, he was riding his bike down the side walk when they moved in. “Neil!” Adam chides, “Sorry, Mom said he needed to come. I’m sorry Tommy.” Adam sits down and then Neil. 

“I don’t mind.” Tommy shrugs, glancing at Neil, “I know that I was freaking out all weird…it happens.” 

“So tell us about yourself.” Abigail says as Adam hands Abigail a peanut butter sandwich, and then offers Tommy one. “Why did you move? Why are you at the cemetery, what are your talents and hobbies? Your hair naturally blonde? Why were you freaking out?” 

Unwrapping the sandwich from the plastic wrap Tommy murmurs, “Well…I’m Tommy Joe Ratliff…we moved from a different part of California and I have post traumatic stress disorder.” He starts, “When I was six my sister was supposed to be watching me but she killed herself in the bathroom and left me alone. My parents put me in therapy when I was seven because I always had nightmares. On Saturday I always went down to her grave…so I figured I’d still do it.” 

It’s quiet for a while and Tommy fears he’s lost his new friends until Abigail says, “You’re one brave fucker…Justin was my brother. My parents abused us and when they found out Justin was protecting me they killed him.” 

Adam hugs them both and tells them they’re both brave. It’s a sweet moment until Neil decides to ruin it by saying, “Last night I had a dream my breath stank so bad I killed Adam!” 

And Abigail cracks up…

-_\/\/_-Siren Jax-_\/\/_-

After that day Adam and Abigail always find Tommy to talk or go walk around the city. Adam’s invited him over for dinner a few times and Abigail has been through Tommy’s horror movie collection quite a few times. 

Mommy and Daddy have met Adam’s parents and seem to get along fine. In fact Daddy encourages Tommy to see Abigail and Adam as much as he wants. “I can see how happy you are.” Ron says, “And I was worried we wouldn’t see that again.” 

Tommy doesn’t even get put back in therapy they let him heal on his own for now. “I think Dr. Parker stressed you out, wondering how you could always get better. We like this Tommy much better than the old one.” Mommy explains. 

Adam kisses him two months after the move and the day they met and Abigail smiles at the loving look in Adam’s eyes and then stunned look in Tommy’s. “Don’t look so lost.” Abigail says, “You know you’ve wanted it for as long as he has.” 

It takes a second, but Tommy finally laughs and kisses Adam back, “Thank you for showing me what happiness is again.” And Adam only smiles into the kiss. 

On the way home from the cemetery Abigail skips in front of them, humming happily in her own world, while Tommy and Adam follow behind, holding hands, and enjoying their own quiet. 

Abigail walks straight into Tommy’s house, spinning around and finishing her song, before announcing to Mr. and Mrs. Ratliff, “They are in love and if you have anything negative to say about it, I’ll summon my alter personality to go all ninja on your butts. How’s that sound?” 

“Terrifying.” Ron smiles, “Absolutely scary.” And Abigail smiles back. “As for my boys…Adam I’ve never seen Tommy so happy as long as you keep him our smiling little blonde then I congratulate you two on finally going out. Thank you Adam, and Abigail for making my son so happy.” 

“Hell yes!” Abigail yells, hugging Ron and then Dia, “Come on you twats, group hug these guys.” And so it was. 

-_\/\/_-Siren Jax-_\/\/_-

“You know.” Tommy says as him, Abigail, and Adam eat peanut butter and jelly at the cemetery, “It’s really awesome you guys took me to see Lisa again, but I wanna stop worrying.”Abigail and Adam look up as Tommy stands, folding his blanket and smiling, “it’s time to move on, she’s happy again, and she’s watching me in the sky, and maybe I’ll never find out why she bled herself dry, but I’m totally ok with that.”

Adam and Abigail both smiles and stand up, folding the blankets they were sitting on. “That was brave.” Adam murmurs, kissing Tommy and taking his hand, “I’m proud of you baby.” 

“So…uh…are we still going to the cemetery at home?” Abigail asks as they get in Adam’s car. 

“You know, Abigail…I can bring good to your apartment. A cemetery is a depressing place to eat. But if you want to we could, it’s your choice, I don’t mind.” Adam says. 

“Listen, if it’s food I don’t give a damn. We could eat under a horses ass for all I care.” Abigail deadpans, “Hey Tommy, you’re a brave twat…I don’t think I could give up on Justin like you gave up on Lisa.” 

Tommy smiles at Abigail in the rearview mirror, and takes Adam’s hand. It’s the sweetest he’ll ever get, but he likes it. She calls him a fucking twat in a nice way. He’s got friends, and a boyfriend, and he wouldn’t change a thing. 

For you I bleed myself dry.

**Author's Note:**

> This was a request from a friend of mine on deviantart and fanfiction. -Siren Jax


End file.
